Now the whole schtick of this blog is “Mack Daddy is different from other dads,” and there’s probably very little doubt about that.
Despite having three young sons, I don’t even have a driver’s licence, for example, let alone a minivan. I carry a switchblade. I could go on but the details probably aren’t too savoury and anyway this isn’t the point.
The point is in some ways I am also very much like other dads. So please pardon me when I sound like all the other dads out there and say that I find my kids quite cute.
But my youngest one, Adam, age 6, has this weird thing where no one is allowed to think, let alone even observe, that he’s cute.
Or particularly to laugh at something he says. The most unbelievable and hilarious things come out of his mouth– and yes, they’re unintentionally hilarious– but if anyone laughs or quotes him he freaks out.
And I’m wondering: does any other parents out there have anything similar with their kids?
For example, over the weekend Mack and Ms. Daddy were dog-sitting for two sets of friends who were going to a wedding.
And on Sunday, when everyone came over to pick up their dogs, my one friend, Patrick, who has a rather large dog called Taz, was kibitzing around and talking to Adam.
“Taz is pretty big, isn’t he Adam? Who do you think weighs more, you or him?”
“I don’t know.”
“Well, he weighs about 50 pounds. What do you weigh?”
“I don’t know. I think our scale is broken. My Mom always says it’s off by ten pounds.”
As the implications of this statement entered our brainpans, we all burst out laughing– then Adam shrieked and burst into tears and went flying out of the room.
Ms. Daddy went to console him, to explain we weren’t laughing at him, but…
But what? He made a statement in complete and utter earnest and everyone burst out laughing. And it was difficult for Ms. Daddy to explain to him just exactly what the joke was.
(She would have had to explain that she was deliberately lying to him about the scale, for starters.)
Really, he never did get it, though of course eventually he regained his equanimity. He always does.
But recently a student teacher laughed at something he said, and he freaked. And on another occasion a teenager stage-whispered to her friend “So cute” and he freaked.
So we’ve been having to sit him down and explain to him that people find him charming, and bright, and engaging. They’re not laughing at him but they’re just surprised by him.
He’s starting to get it. He tends to get most things. But he still sulks and pouts whenever anyone has the effrontery to quote him.
Now, I know even as I type these words I’m being absolutely sickening, saccharine, and insufferable. “Oooh, my kid’s so cute.” Please pardon this display of weakness, my bloggies.
I will return to my normal mode in my next post. But I guess I’m wondering in the meantime: anyone else have this problem?